It's time for her to go...Girl, Bye!

We’ve all had to deal with her at some point in our lives.  Some of us have even allowed her to take up way too much FREE space, mooching off our energy and not giving anything back in return.  

Just how long are you going to let her get away with this? It’s time for her to hear those magic words and send her on her way. 

I know what you’re thinking…you don’t understand, I just can’t kick her out like that.  What will she think of me, what will people say?  Mmmhmm.  I hear ya.  I thought the same thing too. I let her get way too cozy and comfortable with my life. She loved to pop up at the most inconvenient times, especially when I was just about to try something new or empower myself in some amazing way.  Damn, she was quick too.   She would swoop in like a bat out of hell.  Kicking ass and taking names.

I was way too nice to her and put up with her craziness for years. She didn’t go quietly and once in a blue moon she tries to re-connect with me, but those times thankfully are rare.  Once I stood up to her and enforced my boundaries, she backed off and my life began to change for the better.

I know you know who I'm talking about ‘cause she’s been an uninvited guest in your home, too. Her expertise lies in keeping people stuck in unhealthy relationships, dead-end jobs, and snuffing out dreams.

Her name is Ms. Yeahbut.

Sound familiar?  Remember that time she stopped you from doing what you intuitively knew you had to do or wanted to do?  She convinced me to stay in a bad marriage for 20 years.  She also tied me down to plenty of soul-sucking jobs I was too afraid to leave.  If she saw me quietly updating my resume, she would seductively whisper in my ear, "Yeah but, you might get a worse boss. Better the devil you know.”

Unfortunately, I’ve seen firsthand with friends and clients how Ms. Yeahbut destroys hopes and dreams and leaves a trail of disappointments in her wake. 

I worked with someone who was an amazing Reiki teacher and practitioner.  She attracted students and clients effortlessly like moths to a flame.  She would do her Reiki on the side while she plugged away at a 9 to 5 job that she hated and was not suited for.  But get her talking about Reiki and she would light up with the intensity of a thousand suns. 

You see, Reiki was her passion.  Whenever I asked her why she didn’t just quit and pursue teaching Reiki full-time, her usual response was, “Yeah but, I would lose my health insurance” or “yeah but, I need to have a steady paycheck.” 

If you’re not careful, Ms. Yeahbut will gladly take over the steering wheel of your life.  She'll leave you feeling helpless in the back seat with your face pressed up against the window as you watch your life go whizzing by.

It’s time to step into your power, get in her face and tell her, "Girl, bye!”

Speaking about stepping into your power.  Dianne Bentley, the former wife of Alabama's Gov. Robert Bentley, not only kicked her cheating husband to the curb, but helped gather evidence to show that he was using state resources and campaign funds to conceal an affair with a woman on his staff.  Facing impeachment, Gov. Bentley decided to resign just a few weeks ago.

I like to imagine that Dianne, his wife of 50 years, duct tapped Ms. Yeahbut’s mouth shut before she had to chance to tell her, “Yeah but, think about the 50 years you already put into this marriage” or “Yeah but, how are you going to start over at this stage of your life?   In my mind, Gloria Gaynor’s, I Will Survive was playing in the background as Dianne escorted Ms. Yeahbut right out of the Governor’s mansion and added a hearty, "Girl, bye!"

Let today be moving day for your Ms. Yeahbut.  Hand her a suitcase and if you’re feeling generous you can spring for the Uber ride.  Walk her to the car, put a big smile on your face and wave cheerfully as she is whisked away. Wish her well and go on with your new kick-ass life.

I can’t promise she will go away forever.  Heck, she might even try to sneak back into your life.  And if she does, you know what to say...



Leave me a comment below and tell me about your “yeah but”…or if you already kicked her to the curb, how did it change your life?

If you would like some help eliminating ‘Ms. Yeahbut’ from your one and awesome life, contact me at  I’ve got the duct tape handy.